A step-by-step guide to dancing with confidence : NPR

by Curtis Jones December 19, 2024

written by Curtis Jones December 19, 2024 0 comments

A few years ago, I picked up dancing again after many years of taking a break. I was surprised how happy and free it made me feel, in addition to the physical workout. Now I want to share that wonderful feeling with others.

I asked experts to share their best advice on how to dance. Anyone can do it, and no special shoes or skills are required — except, of course, really great music. (Spotify tells me I’m having an “Indie Sleaze Strut Pop” moment, whatever that means.)

As you read this comic, follow each step — and you’ll be moving and grooving in no time.

… until the pandemic. I was living with my parents … and I needed a way to get out of the house. Connie eats dinner with their parents, looking bored. They stare wistfully out a nearby window. So I started taking ballet classes at a local studio — and discovered a new love for something I’d only sort of liked as a teen. It felt good to express myself through movement when so much else in my life was restricted. Connie dances with other adults in class, all wearing face masks.

In fact, studies have found that dancing regularly can help you feel less anxious and stressed. Connie chats with their parents, looking happy and animated. Interested in giving dance a try? Whether you’re a total beginner or coming back to it like me, anyone can dance. Get up and try these steps as you read the comic — and you’ll be dancing in no time! Connie offers a hand to the reader, pulling them into a dance floor full of people having a blast.

Step 1: Play a favorite song and start moving your body any way you like. You may feel awkward, and that’s OK. Here’s what to do when those thoughts start to creep up. Connie crouches over, looking nervous while music plays, thinking “I look weird!” and “Ugh…” “Allow yourself to just feel what you’re feeling,” says Jacelyn Biondo, dance therapist. Jacelyn is a white woman with a shaved head, large round glasses and a septum ring. “Settle into your body, be present, don’t think about whether this looks good.” If you keep at it, you’ll get better at enjoying yourself. Connie dances their way through their earlier anxious thoughts.

Step 2: Try some fun dance moves. Incorporate different motions and maneuvers into your dance. What emotions or images does the music stir up in you? Try translating that into movement. Connie sways slowly to sad music, jumps up and down to a punk song, and does disco fingers to disco music. Don’t worry about dancing the “right” way. “If it feels safe for you, then it’s OK to be moving that way,” says Jacelyn. Below her, various people dance in different ways – an older woman wiggles her arms, a young boy pushes his hands forward, and a woman with curly hair twerks.

Step 3: Find the beat and let it lead you. If you feel confused about when to move your limbs or switch up your moves, try to clap or count along to the beat. Connie claps along to the beat of “Twinkle, twinkle little star,” splitting the first two sentences into eight counts. A lot of pop music is split into measures of four beats, and many dancers will group two measures into a total of eight counts to form phrases they choreograph or dance to. Connie dances through an eight-count choreographic phrase. Once you’ve found the beat, move in sync with it or come up with original moves to set to counts of eight.

Step 4: Resist the urge to dance in front of the mirror. It may just make you more self-conscious. “I think it’s important to understand who you are from the inside out and not lean on the mirror to tell you what’s good, what’s bad,” says Alicia Graf Mack, dean and director of dance at The Juilliard School. Alicia is a black woman with long curly hair. Instead of looking at your reflection, look in the direction of where you want to move your body next. Or close your eyes briefly to feel how your body is moving in space. This can help you feel more connected to your movement. Connie dances, looking at their hands moving and closing their eyes

Step 5: Grab a dance partner. You know what makes dancing even better? Dancing with someone else! Connie and a woman with a long ponytail and short dress approach each other and start dancing together. “When you join somebody in your body, there’s an energetic connection,” says Jacelyn Biondo. Connie and their partner keep dancing together, getting closer and looking into each other's eyes. “A movement connection. An empathetic connection. We are truly seen in that moment.”

I moved out of my parents’ place years ago, but I still dance every week. Connie steps into a side tilt in Kevin’s class. I’ve made so many new friends through my dance classes and performances. I’ve found a whole community of welcoming people. And I’ve learned that dance doesn’t just expand my movements. It expands my world. Connie sits at a table, chatting and waving to different dance friends.

This comic was edited by Malaka Gharib and Beck Harlan. The visual editor is Beck Harlan. We’d love to hear from you. Leave us a voicemail at 202-216-9823, or email us at LifeKit@npr.org.

Listen to Life Kit on Apple Podcasts and Spotify, and sign up for our newsletter. Follow us on Instagram at @NPRLifeKit.

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